The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz

Words Are Magic

Words are magic. Words contain power.

Words can create or destroy. Words can transform or destroy. Words can bring joy and happiness. Words can bring suffering, misery, anger and chaos.

Those who know how to harness the power of words are magicians. With the power of words, people can use them for good or bad and become either light or dark magicians.

A light magician that makes every day a miracle. A dark magician is toxic and brings suffering.

To determine if it is light or dark magic, observe others' reactions when they receive it. Does it bring joy or sadness? Peace or suffering? Happiness or frustration?

If unaware, people can be easily influenced by dark magic. Dark magic can stir up negative emotions. Negative emotions are like parasites that feed off your energy and starve your good feelings.

Negative emotions are harmful, and they are like parasites. If you have these parasites for too long, you become a parasite too. Dark magic wins when people believe and perpetuate negative emotions in others.

Protect yourself.  Stay awake and aware. Trust in your instincts.

Remove these parasites within. When you identify negative emotions within, you need to confront them directly. When you face it, you get to know them better. Over time, your negative emotions become less intense and eventually, it'll be easier to let go.

To do this, you need self-awareness. Self-awareness is the ability to discern reality from the stories of the mind.

The mind controls your emotions and behaviours. They are filled with stories and beliefs that may be true or untrue, helpful or hurtful. The mind dictates whether you are the judge or the victim, the loved or the unloved.

The Healing Balm of Self-Acceptance

To completely heal from the wounds of the parasite, you need the balm of forgiveness.

Forgive yourself.

When you forgive yourself, there is self-acceptance. When there is self-acceptance, you can be free. Acceptance keeps your communications clear and encourages you to speak your truths.

Freedom is to be who you truly are, where you can express what you want or need without judgement. You do not need to control others or be controlled. You do not need to justify your existence nor fear rejection.

To be free, you need the courage to be and express who you are. Most importantly, you need love; to love yourself and embrace your inner perfection.

You cannot change others. Just accept.

For most people, it is easier to wear masks to maintain appearances.  While you can be your true self, you cannot help others to be their true selves. Yet, you cannot change others.

You can only change yourself.

They will need to confront their own negative emotions. You cannot do it for them.

If you try to change someone, you do not accept them as who they are or assume certain things about them. Likewise, if someone tries to change you, they have certain assumptions about you.

Accept others as who they are. In return, others will learn to accept you for who you are.

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